Saturday, October 3, 2009
@ 2:26 PM
i dunno why but this feeling has been bugging me for such a long time....i can't describe it simply, i can only put it in depth, in formal words...
[Those tearless eyes, that bleeding heart]
I am so scared...
so scared that i'll lose very important things...
so afraid that i'll lose sight of something...
so scared i'll lose everything...
so afraid i may lose that very battle
and have no time
and become a nobody
for which i have no idea why it's bugging me
just like feeling the lost of your soul
Tears are filling my eyes
but all it does was to stay there
it doesn't flow
i was emotionless
my emotions are gone
i feel like crying
but i kept on smiling
that smile isn't real anymore
i can't cry anymore
I don't wish to put that fake smile over there
i want to feel that happiness again
that i've once felt before
Please...
dun take them away..
my friends..
dun leave me..
i felt hopeless
so uncontrolable
feelings of nothing just comes in their way
to stop me from getting them back
to lose those powers granted for me
Do i deserve it...?
the help from god
i feel so sad
why it's helping me
but all doesn't seem well on the outside
but only in the class
god help me maintained my studies
but were my good friends too?
I felt that my real soul was gone
someone trying to steal it
or even steal other things important to me
they don't know it
but they are doing it
i won't blame them cos
i know they aren't aware
that my heart is bleeding
because of them...
End of the story from my heart.
This was like the first time i ever written so much about my feelings inside. or maybe the most truthful one. so i showed it, don't destroy it. I need it. I don mind if you hate me because that's what i am. I know i sound very emo but I've been honest already. anyway wrote what was intended. bye
Signing off,
Joyce
Signing off,
Joyce